Guarding Guru Gifts

'I saw him first!'

Tartine

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

Edgar Allen Poe

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Carmel Buildings, Portman Square: A temperance meeting.

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

'My electric car is giving me static!'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Cat Reunion

dog vs UFO...

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

'I could do that.'

"I see you've security marked your property."

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

The Rise of Modern Art

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Well, Scout Smith, escort the little old lay across the street.'

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

'Wow, talk about genius!'

"Don't forget to put some sunscreen on your tongue."

"welcome man cave."

Organic Soldering.

Kirsten Johnson

Inflating Boobs.

"Whine and cheezed party."

AI Safety Officer

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

'Oops! Sorry! I should've said, 'buckle your seat belts'!'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'