Gatekeeper Guru Gifts

Folsom Prison - A Gated Community

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

"Your PA isn't due up here for another 27 years. You'll just have to answer the questions yourself."

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

Man at Heaven's gate with different college letter than St. Pete

"Am I rusting? I think one of my sections is sinking. Oh, no! I thought I heard the gate squeak."

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

Doorman for the Three Little Pigs

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

Heaven Security Checks.

'I can't believe I locked my keys inside, again!'

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"

Julia Childs combats a growing rabbit population

'Do you have a reservation?'

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."

"Good morning passengers awaiting Flight 3335 to Lisbon. We just want to remind you that if the planes leaves the ground and you're not on it, you'll regret it..."

Freedom of information

'He's always on heightened alert.'

"There's a man here who wants to add insult to injury."

"The old pearly gates looked nice, but they were hell to maintain."

'It's a cease and desist order. States that we can't keep anyone out. It's based on the ruling: The more the merrier.'

"I'm sorry, but Mr. Barclay is not putting up with people like you anymore."

Flight Departures

"It's a no-go area."

Heavens gate 'Please enter, Do not fear to tread'

"Let me speak to the CEO's secretary. She's in the know."

I can't see him - can I take a message?

'I didn't know I'd need a PIN number!'

'I saw him first!'

Welcome to Flower Ridge - Traditional values strictly enforced.