Gatekeeper Aficionado Gifts

Welcome to Flower Ridge - Traditional values strictly enforced.

Heavens gate 'Please enter, Do not fear to tread'

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"Just one more question before I let you in...I can let you in...are you a cat or dog person?"

Cat statues on entrance gate

"He's a guard dog."

"All we have left is standing room only."

"You're a physician? Let me ask you about a problem that I've been having."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

Closed Thursdays.

"Hey, there's a spare key hidden under this cloud!"

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

"It was just a near-death experience, but while you're here, would you help me with this computer?"

Football Security

'Let's see...yes, there is a wing upgrade for a soul patch.'

Heaven Security Checks.

"Actually, I'm just the night manager here."

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

"Go on in. You're the first onslaught."

Doorman for the Three Little Pigs

'I can't believe I locked my keys inside, again!'

'Yeah, Saint Peter here. I locked myself out again.'

"I don't care if you are the invisible man, sir, I can't let you in if you're not wearing a tie!"

'My Dad said I'll be an international goalkeeper when I grow up!'

David de Gea

The goalkeeper puts up a wall of bricks

'Do you have a reservation?'

'I don't care who you have a note from!'

"Your reputation for taking penalties doesn't scare me... Ready when you are."

Folsom Prison - A Gated Community

BEWARE OF THE GOD.

"I know it looks a little rough but we're having all the puffy stuff reupholstered this week."

'It's a cease and desist order. States that we can't keep anyone out. It's based on the ruling: The more the merrier.'

"You must have noticed they fielded a weaker side. Their mascot was playing in goal."