Grumpy Citizen Gifts

"I'd tell you all about the upcoming election, but I don't want to depress you."

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"I do wish Henry could run into someone from the dress business to talk to."

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

'Oh that?... It has nothing to do with the formula; it just makes the whole thing seem less grumpy.'

Old Man Journal

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

"Oh my God with the singing!"

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

"To be perfectly honest, Tarquin, I get fed up listening to your stories about 'the good old days'."

'Sunnyside down.'

'To be honest, you're the only one who sometimes bothers to hear my complaints.'

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

"If you're going out, pick up some candles."

'It's not just drugs - Fenton has zero tolerance for everything!'

Beware of Curmudgeon!

'FQ...?'

"Being in the now today sure ain't like the good ol' now!"

I HATE STUFF

"Tuna on rye, hold the smile."

"Stop moaning - you'll ruin our weekend away..."

Uncle Murray Weekly

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

Grumpy old men: I was an nwanted child, even my mother left me before I was born.

'Face it Marvin, you're a madstrom of conflicting emotions.'

Moan Pig.

Pissed-off hour.

"No more cross buns for you!"

It was only a matter of time until Gertrude turned into a grumpy cat.

'The problem with politics is politicians!'

"He's a curmudgeon now, but he used to be just a mean old bastard."

'Not now - I'm under a lot of atmospheric pressure.'

Old woman staring at pregnant woman's bump.