Grumpy Birdwatcher Gifts

"It's chirp, chirp, chirp time again, isn't it?"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Intelligent people laugh too!

They try, but those crows can't make noises they used to. The lost caws!

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

"Sure my wings flap 70 times per second-- I've been sipping nectar all day."

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

"You're worried about salmonella? We're vultures for cripes sake!"

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

"Two vegans, please."

"Do you know any other songs besides the theme to The Andy Griffin Show?"

"Migration ruins my 10,000 steps."

'Well, thanks, but we have no need of a Divorce Lawyer: We're Lovebirds you see...'

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

Bird Torture.

'It's a blonde, long-legged species with a melodious voice and it goes south for the winter.'

Beaver tower

'You head south without me. I'll be fine.'

'Hey, want to go to the beach ...I mean ...the birdbath?'

'There's too many of us... I'm going to start forming a 'W'.'

Do you have to play air guitar every time we sing?

Birds Following Witch.

"Yes, it's a safe: I was fed up with my winter provisions being raided by freeloaders!"

Trick or Tweet

'Honey, bring the camera, he's standing on one leg!!!'

'They're still following me?! Oh geez, what if they're in some sort of gang or something?'

'Mom and dad...if someone threw a rock at me, it would really be like killing two birds with one stone.' 'I told you if we had a child, he'd be a wise-quacker.'

"He wasn't even early - he was on his way home from a party!"

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

Bird collecting furniture for it's home.