Grub Gourmet T-Shirts

'Whoa, I gotta lay off the grubs.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

The wonderful world of cheese.

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"Can you romance me after my tiramisu?"

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

French wine

To do before Saturday...

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

Too much cilantro

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

The Main Types of Cheese

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"