Grocery Day Dreamer Gifts

"Thanks for going to the store to get my butter, Baldo. But..why'd you buy 23 Super Red sodas?"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

'Do we have any alligator pears?'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

"You arrived as bottom-feeders, but you shall leave as bottom-gourmands."

'Can we get the corn that's already been chewed?!'

'Look, Mum, those loaves have had some babies!'

Friendly bacteria

'I tried those once. They leaked.'

'And here on our left you see the sugary cereal aisle...a real crowd pleaser!'

"I'd like a wine that was born in France and then bummed around California."

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

'You'll like this. It has no nutritional value at all.'

The only place it's okay to pick your nose.

"Mummy! Can't we go to Tescos like everyone else?"

"I know I've matured because I choose to purchase my own candy instead of stealing my children's."

"I need one of them and one of them..."

"Would you like your milk in a bag?"

"Why doesn't the budget ax ever fall in the produce department?"

"Louie 'Three Fingers,' Tony 'The Chin,' Joey Alfonso... Dang it, Vinny, you brought me the hit list instead of the grocery list!"

Fresh Food and Regurgitated

'I don't understand how our grocery prices have inflated 15% yet you've inflated 25%'

"Today is catch-your-own day."

Do me a favor - don

Beverages. Drinking Water. (Some Assembly Required.) Oxygen. Hydrogen.

Little Miss Muffet in Store.

"I'm still trying to get used to ordering food online."

Christmas food.

Woman has man in shopping trolley

"Man, what I wouldn't do for some Chinese take-out."