Gourmet Dreamer Gifts

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

Tramp enjoys good food.

"You arrived as bottom-feeders, but you shall leave as bottom-gourmands."

Tramp reading Good Food Guide.

"You suppose, somewhere out there, there are peanut butter fish?"

"Just once I'd like something to die that tastes like a yummy fruit puff pastry dessert."

Policeman complains about his food

"I'd like a wine that was born in France and then bummed around California."

Fantasy Diet League

Counting ribs

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

Today's special... donuts.

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

It turns out they don't go together so well,

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

To do before Saturday...

The Main Types of Cheese

Too much cilantro

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

'You wanted to be a wine maker in the worst way, Paul - and you've succeeded.'

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

Cheese

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"I use broccoli rabe as a litmus test."

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

Holiday Supplies