Green-side Giggler Gifts

Men working sign at golf hole

The Busy Gardener

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Garden variety allergies."

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

Yard Sale

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. IX

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

Beginning Yarder.

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'...and this is the water garden...'

'Where are you going?'

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

"Things are getting really bad around here. Phil, the office plant, was just let go."

Balding gnomes

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

Grass saying: mow me/feed me/weed me/roll me.

"I now recognize the basement was a bad idea."

"I used to have A Green thumb but it was mainly for hedge funds."

'But, Mom - I am watering the garden just like you told me!'