Green Gambler Gifts

'I refuse to answer on the grounds it might tend to incriminate me!'

The world at stake...

'You don't have to shout fore when you putt.'

'I'll meet your carbon output and lower you two units.'

I think you're ace

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

'The ball never goes where I hit it.'

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

'Listen up troop. We're going on a treasure hunt.'

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

'Our ceiling is under repair--sorry.'

'Now that should make it a lot easier.'

Despite his perfect 'Poker Face'. the others always seemed to know when Toby had a good hand...

'I'll see your dirty laundry, and raise you six children.'

"Tell us the truth - it was you pedaling all the time, wasn't it?"

'Grown-ups sure make playing a lot of work.'

'You might try the chef's surprise, if you're a real daredevil.'

High Stakes Texas Hold 'Em

'You had to go for a walk--now we've lost our table.'

'Two pair ain't gonna cut it, Joseph. I've got three kings.'

European Space Agency.

"I'm afraid you can't speak to the Chef at the moment, sir. He's out, buying you a, 'get well soon' card."

"Rats! It's already tenderized."

'We've had our starter and to follow we'd like to order an ambulance!'

"I don't think I'm ever going to get a hole in one!"

Recycling basketballs

'What am I going to do now that I've won the lottery? Stay in the contracting until it runs out.'

who says you cant make your own wine out of gooseberries

'But I've got potential. I bought 2 lottery tickets yesterday.'

'Instead of going to that boring museum for a class trip, I suggest we go to the World Series of Poker. I'm sure the rest of the class won't mind.'

'These shooting sticks are not very comfortable!'

Even with his lucky clover necklace, Sam couldn't win at cards

A child pulls the lever of a machine that is combination of both a slot machine and a gumball machine.

"I lost my wife."