Greediness Guru T-Shirts

"Of course we should get equal pay, it's time men realised we're just as greedy as they are."

Happy hour.

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

'I'm not motivated by profit, Henderson - I'm motivated by excessive profit.'

Smart card.

Greed.

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

'I today's market news, Greed roared back.'

'Economic Growth' Elephant balancing on top of the world in a circus ring. Accompanied by a 'fat cat' ring master.

"I make money, therefore I am."

Cartoon computer

'I'll have the 'All of the above.''

'Hey! It's way too early to declare me, 'Nerd of the Century'!'

'Just be patient. Greed always makes a come back.'

"Ted's been down in the dumps since they started giving greed a bad name."

"I'm not all you can eat? But I brought my special plate!"

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"All yours, Buddy. I'm ALREADY living on house money."

"I volunteer for the Samaritans. I tried to phone in sick this morning but they talked me out of it."

"Finally, a co-worker who CAN handle Big data!"

'Can't you stop being charitable, we are on vacation.'

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

Don't laugh, my house is paid for.

"We merged to save through volume buying."

'Help! -- I ate too much and I can't get up!'

'Did anyone save a stomach for dessert?'

'I wish John would stop using that gourmet pet food that makes gravy when you add water.'

The Last Jerseys.

"That's an old wives' tale. Money does make you happy!"

Investments: Getting In Touch With Your Inner Greed

A worm sits in comfort as he has just eaten 4 apples by himself...