Greed Humorist Gifts

"Hi, J.B. Guess where I am."

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

'I'm not motivated by profit, Henderson - I'm motivated by excessive profit.'

Greed.

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

"This city is becoming unlivable."

'Economic Growth' Elephant balancing on top of the world in a circus ring. Accompanied by a 'fat cat' ring master.

"I make money, therefore I am."

'Just be patient. Greed always makes a come back.'

"Ted's been down in the dumps since they started giving greed a bad name."

A dead business executive is lowered into the grave with his desk

Investments: Getting In Touch With Your Inner Greed

"That's an old wives' tale. Money does make you happy!"

Pet Cemetery.

'He owes $30,000 for a degree in drama but right now he's not acting.'

'They're the angel of social conscience funds and his evil twin, greedy devil.'

Borrowed 200K for mime school

Headstone in bird cage, "We really loved our budgie.."

Stocks dropped sharply on the rumor the government will appoint a greed czar.

"If we want to get across our warnings about the dire consequences of not saving for a future then we need powerful dramatic message!"

"It looks like they're getting tougher, honey."

'The cat does like having something to scratch.'

"The kids of today catch on so quickly, Ted! Remember how long it took US to master the finer points of crony capitalism?"

Bear in hotdog eating contest.

'Um, the Christmas bonus was for all the staff...'

"That wasn't very funny!"

Death awaits the last leaf of Autumn with a rake.

"I'm the Ghost of Christmas Debts Past."

The Stock Market Giveth. . . The Stock Market Taketh Away.

"Ambitions... to be corrupted by power"

God and Mammon

"You gotta teach me that trick."

'Goodbye, Charles; have a greed-is-good day.'