Grazing Gagster Gifts

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

Snowprov

'Oh Hi!'

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're our only hope."

'Eat the grass in perfect circles. It drives them crazy.'

Figure 1. NASA Mars Rovers: A Family Tree

"One more question, Mr Cake. How do you feel about wearing a sheet, creeping about people's bedrooms and saying 'woo'?"

'Tell us what you've done with all the grass!'

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

'Because only men can believe than 1 inch equals a mile.'

"He had help. There were architecture specialists, costume specialists, angel specialists..."

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'

"Is there any way we could describe this bit of old tart that would make a Russian oligarch pay £2 million for it?"

I think the speed grazing record is in the bag!

'I don't get it. All we eat is hay and grass, and yet we're a veritable storehouse of cholesterol.'

How's the writer's block?

For Tom, learning to gargle was finally paying off!

'I may not know much about art but I know what I like to slag off.'

'You can see the artist has tried to capture man's aspirations, using a minimalist language.'

'Robert likes to watch the mechanic as he works.'

NINJA GRAZER

It was love at first sight...then one of them got hungry.

Is there life after digestion?

"Must dash - I'm appearing in a 'restaurant soup' cartoon this afternoon..."

'My human puts two scoops of chaff, one scoop of nuts, 1/4 scoop of feed balancer, a scoop of garlic, herbs, salt, mood calmer, electrolytes and more into my feed every day. But you just can't beat this stuff!'

Let's not make this personal!

The Big Nosh

'Meadow fescue, meadow grass and perennial ryegrass! This is going to be the best party ever!'

There's no reason to feel guilty - You're not the only vegetarian to get swine flu.

"Sorry, Higgins, but this isn't a diploma. It's a subpoena!"

'Oh gross, manure.'

"I'm greener, yes. But am I happier?"