Grape Grappler Gifts

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

The Jeopardy of Progress

Wine Lady

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

"God works in mysterious ways."

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

Bad times to sneeze

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

The Grapes of Wrath finally get some professional help.

Wine tasting

"I spent all day looking for this Malbec, not that anybody cares."

'I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course, I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it.'

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

"Soy milk and rice milk are okay but I prefer grape milk.".

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

'Bruce! 'ow many times must I tell 'ya? Only one wave of the bloomin' terroir flag over the fruit!'

Schoolboy with lunch box.

"Now this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still haven't been here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves."

'Hey, if they can grow in Michigan...'

Wine connoisseur in search of new vintage.(Wine)

"To tourists this just looks like a pile of rotten and damaged grapes. But here at Trendy Vineyards, we look at it and see Special Select Reserve."

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

'Move? Are you kidding? With the wines the guy next door collects?'

'I would've done better in geography, but the test on Australia boomeranged.'

"It's an agreeable little wine."

Wine Lovers