Gravity Grappler Gifts

Bad times to sneeze

The Jeopardy of Progress

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

Secretive Weigh In.

"God works in mysterious ways."

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

'Today I invested in some Chinese stocks, but I felt greedy again in an hour.'

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

'The actors guild suspended my membership.'

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

"Marriage and water, I find, don't mix."

'I think I caught one of those fish showing on the graph.'

'I would've done better in geography, but the test on Australia boomeranged.'

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

Cat boxer

"Look, I got a good grade because I worked hard. It's like riding a bike...stay in your seat, keep moving forward and you'll reach your goal. Unless you hit a lipstick case dropped in the middle of the road."

'Mum, Dad, I've downgraded my academic forecast.'

'Such petulance!'

'If I had Doppler, it would be predicting a storm when my parents see this grade on my meteorology test.'

How's the writer's block?

'If my grades don't improve, I don't know what'll happen. Maybe they'll offer me a buyout.'

'Alright, gentlemen, I think we'll dispense with 'cheese'...'

'You're not achieving the bench marks.'

'Part of me wants to get caught. I need to get in touch with that part and beat the hell out of it.'

"There is no complaint department, Robert."