Gag Grappler Gifts

How's the writer's block?

The Jeopardy of Progress

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

Pinocchio's Second Realization

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

Secretive Weigh In.

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

"God works in mysterious ways."

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

'Meaning of life? You bet! Here, pull my finger.'

"Today you will learn the 'Paper Cut' technique."

Bad times to sneeze

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

Teacher boxing book: 'As I told you, today we're gonna really hit the books!'

Comedy School: 'Please knocky nicky nooo!'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

'Today I invested in some Chinese stocks, but I felt greedy again in an hour.'

"Keep it up. His knuckles are getting really sore"

Up your end.

"On the one hand, we'll burn in hell; on the other, that's a lot of money."

Man crushing grapes with flippers.

'Sorry professor, my mind was some other place.'

"Sorry about that. Just following the serving suggestion."

"Marriage and water, I find, don't mix."

'I would've done better in geography, but the test on Australia boomeranged.'

'If I had Doppler, it would be predicting a storm when my parents see this grade on my meteorology test.'

"Look, I got a good grade because I worked hard. It's like riding a bike...stay in your seat, keep moving forward and you'll reach your goal. Unless you hit a lipstick case dropped in the middle of the road."

'Mum, Dad, I've downgraded my academic forecast.'

Cat boxer

Dummy no. 5836 was found lying in a pool of his own fake vomit.

'Such petulance!'