Gourmet Experience Seeker T-Shirts

'Welcome monsieur et madame, may I take your coats, gloves and savings?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'A cheeky red?'

La Table

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

I wish I'd had the review.

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

'What wine goes with comfort foods?'

Holiday Supplies

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

Man's cooking explodes.

"It's been redacted to produce our sauces."

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

"I don’t know, Margaret. She looks like the type who makes exotic stuffings."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'