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'Truffles again?'

"Not just a wheel, Trog, but a wheel of aged Parmigiano Reggiano!"

'Oh great. All we've got to eat are fish.'

Dog Returns To Hunter With Bottle Of Champagne

'Hang on! Is it triple filtered?'

"The food here is very good- a little oily, but good."

'What no garnish or side salad?'

Pig asking whether the farmers truffles are 'Rum or Champagne?'

"Whatever is quickest - I'm starving!"

A restaurant with a "Main Dining Room" and a "Room for Dessert".

"Wow, you've got to try this combination."

"Pinot Noir, God's apology for White Zinfandel."

'So to sum up this lengthy discussion: at the next meeting we'd prefer one platter of Brie and grape, one of honey glazed ham, and one of roast beef with wild horseradish - and NO cheese and pickle.'

'After crab-cheese canapes, Brazilian fish chowder...'

'Fresh ground pepper?'

What keeps me at my best is the feeling that anyone of them might be a restaurant critic.

'What are you doing putting ketchup on my souffle??? I worked all day on that! Are you out of your mind??'

'Food in this restaurant is rather disgusting! -I agree! And look how small the portions are!'

'Chef has a Michelin star - But for being a loyal tyre customer.'

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

"Oh my God! I DO taste delicious!"

"It's become so expensive, that if I want sushi, I have to catch my own!"

"Won't be long, folks. Just having some new menus printed."

"My aged cheddar died!"

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

Haute Chinese

Fantastic, fit, fortysomething exec, interested in culture, athletic pursuits, and gourmet food, seeks intelligent, dynamic, thirtysomething beauty for evolving relationship leading marriage.

"Yes, sir. The prices are given on request. However, all requests must be in writing."

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

A Mystery, Wrapped In An Enigma Served On A Bed Of Lettuce

A dog drinking water from a bowl labeled "Water with just a hint of lime".

"I'm a lawyer, so I'll try the torte."

"I'm sorry, but Chef Scott feels he's moved beyond that concept."

"So no one actually sends you compliments. Isn't this enough?"

"I love home-cooked meals that were made in other people's homes by other people."