Gourmet Cat Chef Gifts

'See, it's very good cat food!'

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"Sauted lard, please."

"Excuse me, but I'm the only one who opens cans around here!"

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

Sandwich snob.

"When dad cooks dinner, it's hard to tell if he's opening cans for us or the cat."

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

'We'd like something new and improved for dinner.'

'Those tid-bits you left for Ming Toy were delicious, Mrs. Caldwell!'

End of the day bargains at the cheese counter.

'Blimey, how old is this stilton?' 'Let;s put it this way...it used to be cheddar.'

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

'She's killing me with kindness!'

"Jean-Pierre, homemade caviar for table six, please!"

"This isn't just any old food wine. This is the foodies' food wine."

'Ketchup? You know that's an insult to the chef, right?'

'Freshly ground catnip on your salad?'

'Thanks, I found the cheesecloth. Can you recommend a nice wine to serve with it?'

"Sous vide hot dog round, dehydrated generic bun dust, sweet relish foam, ketchup tuile."

'Fruits, vegetables, meat, eggs and cooked beans! He gets a better dinner than I do!'

'Gentlemen, tonight's special is broiled sea urchin, with raspberries, over candy corn, with a goat's milk sauce. I would suggest a wine to recommend with it, had I attended sommelier school in the Twilight Zone.'

"Examine the bottle? Sniff the cork? At these prices why am I doing all the work?"

"Has someone forgotten the cucumber slice and lemon wedge in my spring water again, Edna?"

"Do you want a clean one?"

Cat looking up fish recipes.

'I'm a situational vegan. If someone else is paying it's an eight ounce kobi steak for me.'

"The slow approach, the suspicious sniff, the final turning away...nobody does finicky like Precious."

'Care to join me in a tuna casserole?'

"If we list it now, you could be eating filet mignon every night for the rest of your life!"

"Wait! I forgot the garnish."