Gourmet Cat Chef Pillows

'See, it's very good cat food!'

Nothing beats the love of a good cat.

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"Excuse me, but I'm the only one who opens cans around here!"

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

"Sauted lard, please."

Sandwich snob.

'Blimey, how old is this stilton?' 'Let;s put it this way...it used to be cheddar.'

'We'd like something new and improved for dinner.'

'Those tid-bits you left for Ming Toy were delicious, Mrs. Caldwell!'

End of the day bargains at the cheese counter.

"When dad cooks dinner, it's hard to tell if he's opening cans for us or the cat."

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

'She's killing me with kindness!'

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

'Freshly ground catnip on your salad?'

"This isn't just any old food wine. This is the foodies' food wine."

"Jean-Pierre, homemade caviar for table six, please!"

"Sous vide hot dog round, dehydrated generic bun dust, sweet relish foam, ketchup tuile."

'Ketchup? You know that's an insult to the chef, right?'

'Thanks, I found the cheesecloth. Can you recommend a nice wine to serve with it?'

'Fruits, vegetables, meat, eggs and cooked beans! He gets a better dinner than I do!'

'Gentlemen, tonight's special is broiled sea urchin, with raspberries, over candy corn, with a goat's milk sauce. I would suggest a wine to recommend with it, had I attended sommelier school in the Twilight Zone.'

"Has someone forgotten the cucumber slice and lemon wedge in my spring water again, Edna?"

"Examine the bottle? Sniff the cork? At these prices why am I doing all the work?"

"Do you want a clean one?"

Cat looking up fish recipes.

'I'm a situational vegan. If someone else is paying it's an eight ounce kobi steak for me.'

"The slow approach, the suspicious sniff, the final turning away...nobody does finicky like Precious."

'Care to join me in a tuna casserole?'

"Wait! I forgot the garnish."

"If we list it now, you could be eating filet mignon every night for the rest of your life!"