Gourmet Beverage Appreciator Gifts

'Sorry, I only drink still wines. I don't have the patience to wait for bubbles to pop.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'No ice.'

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

Join me in a Martini?

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"An everything Martini, please."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Scotch and water musick."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

"Shower beers? Aisle eight."

"Great coffee, Carole."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

'Fried chickens.'

"The food here is excellent- what time is breakfast?"

I told you I got us the best table in the house. Pizza.

"What'll ya have?"

"And then, suddenly, it was 3 P.M., and she hadn't really got anything done."

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

Haute Chinese

Join me for dinner?

Cheese Pile

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

Thermidor Dali