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'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

"Damn! - They've just raised my retirement age to 1,250...!"

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

Bram Stoker

Trilby - 'Dodor in his glory'.

Nick Cave

"I know we're not supposed to invite them over the threshold dear, but it seemed awfully rude to leave him standing on the doorstep."

Bride of Frankenstein charges her phone

"You never know what will catch on!"

The Goblin and the Sexton

The Headless Horseman claims his luggage.

Trilby - 'Au clair de la lune'.

Trilby - 'Confession

Poems to Spookify

Janet Leigh caricature

Count Alucard's Night-Care Center.

Trilby - 'Malbrouck s'en va-t'en guerre'.

"I figured I've got the money so why not spend it."

Trilby - 'For Gecko'.

"He goes to the bathroom a lot. Where did you get the kidneys?"

A Hellish Thing (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner).

Trilby - 'May heaven go with her!'

'You've become a right pain in the neck.'

Trilby - 'I believe you, my boy!'

Trilby - 'Voila l'espayce de hom ker jer swee!'

The ghost's walk

Mermaids

'We were introduced by a scientist friend of ours, then discovered we both like getting caught in electrical storms and taking long walks on the beach to scare people."

"Yes, there is a pre-existing condition. I was once dead."

'No, I'm sorry - the nose ring is going to have to go!'

'It's ALIVE! IT'S ALIVE! And smells delicious!'