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"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

"Nah, not my type."

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

'He likes to power nap.'

Out To Lurch

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

The Reaper's Arms

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"800 years old?!! - Gosh... you must be feeling very 'long-in-the tooth."

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

Vampire coming out of a body piercing shop with a stake in his heart

The Raven in Flight

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"

Trilby - 'Oh my poor girl! my poor girl!'

'Oi mate! No hoods in the shopping mall.'

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

"I had a Caesar salad for lunch, but that was two days ago."

Trilby - 'Ca fera une fameuse crapule de moins'

"You dressed!"

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

Cosmetic Stone Mason.

'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

Four Horsemen.

"Graveyards always put me ill at ease."

"Do not, I repeat, do NOT light his candle."

Trilby - 'Oh don't you remember sweet Alice, Ben Bolt?'

"No monster, when I said 'lend me a hand'..."

'He's always been a bit of an eccentric...'

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

'R.I.P. Van Winkle, just sleeping.'