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A Hellish Thing (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner).

"Time's up, honey."

Trilby - 'An atmosphere of bank-notes and gold'.

"I know we're not supposed to invite them over the threshold dear, but it seemed awfully rude to leave him standing on the doorstep."

'It's ALIVE! IT'S ALIVE! And smells delicious!'

'Er. . . I had an appointment with Dr. Jekyll. . .'

'Now remember: upon completion, we do NOT offer the Count a free set of bathroom mirrors!'

Claudette Melanson

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Trilby - 'The sweet melodic phrase.'

'..It's just that with all your amazing powers of deduction and elimination, Holmes, I'm just a little surprised that the best solution you can come up with for seeing off the hound of the Baskervilles, is to 'chase them across the moors with a hoover. up

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

Trilby - 'Dodor in his glory'.

"You never know what will catch on!"

Bride of Frankenstein charges her phone

'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

Trilby - Mademoiselle Ernestine singing 'Les Cloches du Monastere'.

'Heathcliff! Oh, Heathcliff!'

The Goblin and the Sexton

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

Count Alucard's Night-Care Center.

'I'm not trying to take away from the fact that you are a twisted, brilliant genius. . .but what is with the size of this bloody forehead?!?'

Trilby - The 'Rosemonde' of Schubert.

Trilby - 'Au clair de la lune'.

Trilby - 'Confession

Trilby - 'For Gecko'.

Till life do you part.

Poems to Spookify

'I'm telling you I don't know where your goat is, look in the classifieds.'

"He goes to the bathroom a lot. Where did you get the kidneys?"

'You've become a right pain in the neck.'

Trilby - 'I will not! I will not!'

Trilby - 'Voila l'espayce de hom ker jer swee!'

'He just loves the hokey-pokey, doesn't he?'

The ghost's walk