Gluten-free Eating Gifts

"No bread for Grampa. He's on a glutten-free diet."

"One slice—hold the bread."

Bakery. Your doctor put you on a no-bread diet? Yeah, I'm following the path of yeast resistance.

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Kitchen Kapers

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

Modern Witch Shoppe

The eye of newt - Is it gluten-free?

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

"Enlightenment can only come when you realize there is more to life than gluten free hot sauce."

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"We couldn't find a raw-vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, non-G.M.O. cake for your birthday, so we got you nothing."

"And for all you people with food allergies, this next song's lyrics contain no gluten or peanuts."

Gluten-free Santa

Buffet - now glutton free.

A psychic predicts the discovery of gluten.

"And the best part of grinding their bones to make your bread - totally gluten free!"

"There's our cure for the munchies! Gluten, we love your pizza!!" "You're our hero, gluten."

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

'How do we know he's gluten-free?'

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

Allergen Lab. That wheat protein is surrounded by antibodies, but he's not backing down! He's a real gluten for punishment!

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

Gluten-Free Church

"It's the gluten-free edition."

The Gluten is Free. RUN!