Gluten-free Cuisine Gifts

Our cook has a gluten allergy. We need to separate the wheat from the chef!

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Kitchen Kapers

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

Modern Witch Shoppe

The eye of newt - Is it gluten-free?

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

"Yes, I'm sure some child in Brussels won't starve if you eat his sprouts."

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

"One slice—hold the bread."

"Enlightenment can only come when you realize there is more to life than gluten free hot sauce."

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

"We couldn't find a raw-vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, non-G.M.O. cake for your birthday, so we got you nothing."

"And for all you people with food allergies, this next song's lyrics contain no gluten or peanuts."

Gluten-free Santa

A psychic predicts the discovery of gluten.

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"And the best part of grinding their bones to make your bread - totally gluten free!"

Buffet - now glutton free.

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

'How do we know he's gluten-free?'

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

"It's the gluten-free edition."

Gluten-Free Church

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

"How could they possibly know it's gluten-free, low gi. . . ?"

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."