Glitter Pillows

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Do you think I'm sixty?

Disco Bunny.

"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

You just keep giving.

'It's always the same, isn't it, Dave?... Every time you spot a glitter ball!'

"I think glamour is fine until it slips over into glitz."

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

I didn't dress this way to go unnoticed

"Excuse me, where's your glitter lipstick?"

'That's your solution to everything, isn't it? Throw a bucket of glitter over it.'

Dancing in tailcoats

'You're too heavy on metals and too light on equities.'

"I bedazzled my boobs for your birthday." "Ohhh. Myyyy."

Merrily covering everything in glitter...

How the other half live.

'Sorry I'm late - my wife's tongue stud got snagged on my nipple ring.'

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

'So you think a little litter on my eyelids would send out the wrong message?'

"This one is a storybook Arts and Crafts home. The glitter stencils and macaroni art is all original."

"Yeah, but I'm sick of the glitter getting all over everything."

'Remind me again. . . who's chasing who?'

"Genuine? Of course it's genuine...zirconia."

'I've been glamped!'