Glitter Gifts

No, dear, you didn

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

Glue gun? Glitter? Dang it, I grabbed my crafting belt again.

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

Disco Bunny.

Do you think I'm sixty?

"Why don't you move over here, Mr. Lowery, where you'll be closer to everything."

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

You just keep giving.

The stone is semi-precious, so I got you two.

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

Carole Lombard

"I think glamour is fine until it slips over into glitz."

'It's always the same, isn't it, Dave?... Every time you spot a glitter ball!'

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

I didn't dress this way to go unnoticed

Bar Refaeli

"Excuse me, where's your glitter lipstick?"

True, I've seen plenty of padded resumes, but very few bejeweled resumes.

"I bedazzled my boobs for your birthday." "Ohhh. Myyyy."

'You're too heavy on metals and too light on equities.'

Dancing in tailcoats

'That's your solution to everything, isn't it? Throw a bucket of glitter over it.'

Merrily covering everything in glitter...

'Sorry I'm late - my wife's tongue stud got snagged on my nipple ring.'

"This one is a storybook Arts and Crafts home. The glitter stencils and macaroni art is all original."

How the other half live.

'So you think a little litter on my eyelids would send out the wrong message?'

'...Then I swept down the staircase, into the ballroom.'

'Remind me again. . . who's chasing who?'

"Yeah, but I'm sick of the glitter getting all over everything."

"For Mother's Day I decorated the whole kitchen with glitter."