Glass Fitting Gifts

'Don't worry, Fred, there's nothing there, but it always stops the traffic for us to cross the road.'

"Talk nerdy to me."

'Is the glass half full, Wally, or half empty?' - 'Oh, oh! Trick question!'

Tommy Cooper at the bottle bank - Glass, Bottle, Bottle, Glass..

Bottle Bank: For the Colour Blind.

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

Romantic Glass Blower

'He left for the office in a bit of a temper!'

'Just one more and this puppy is headed for another bar.'

"I know the schools are great, but is this really the house we want to ride out the apocalypse in?"

Wine-tasting Tour.

Man blowing glass. His dentures have fallen out and are in the glass bubble.

"I heard they make glass from sand but I have no idea where to begin."

Sorry, what did you say? This new double glazing will be good for noise reduction!

"I'm getting a slight draught through the double glazing, you fitted for me."

'I like to get here right when Dave opens up, and get a clean glass.'

'...Err...Could I have a straight glass, Landlord?'

'Okay, son...Today, I want you to play soccer at Poolbeg Street, Gloucester Street and East Lombard Street!'

'I tend to look on the negative side of things. Do you guys do rose coloured glasses'

'He's a nice boy - It's a shame how some people take advantage!'

"You see spots in front of you? Have you cleaned your glasses lately?"

'I thought your quote for 'putting windows in' was cheap.'

'Here, if you don't do windows, you're through!'

Professional Glass-Blowing Demonstration.

'Ye olde optician.'

J.Froggett Glaziers - "Now go get some business"

"I'm gonna kick your glass!"

"Thursdays and Saturdays, it's glassblowing, Mondays and Wednesdays it's Morris dancing!"

Optometry. I'll take them.

'Did you or did you not tell me to collect the glasses?'

Glass Production