Girlfriends Chatting Over Coffee Gifts

"I like my coffee like my men: light and weak."

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

'I have a master's in 17th century Dutch feminist poetry, but I've never really used it.'

"I know it's only been a little while since we've been allowed to mingle again but I'm already getting really tired of people."

'I'm looking for people who find me intimidating.'

'But you distinctly said working breakfast.'

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

'I don't care what he says, child labor laws were never intended to protect the rights of children in their mid-30s.'

"So have you been watching Bridgerton?"

"Could you repeat all that, I lost you at 'good morning.'"

"Sergio, you are the best father in the world. Except, you know, when you're not."

"It just wasn't working out. He's liberal low-carb and I'm strict keto."

'Normally I don't mind regifting but on occasion you get back the same hideous thing you tried to get rid of.'

"If he were just 8 inches taller, 20 years younger,10 times more mature and a million dollars richer, he'd be perfect."

"I'm dating a much younger guy....makes sense, my ex was a cheetah."

"I've been dating this homeless guy..."

"What is friendship if not constant amateurish psychoanalysis?"

"I remember when you could order a cup of coffee in two or three words."

"Remind me what I was talking about—I wasn't listening."

'Well there hasn't been a ring yet! But he did say that we were going to look at bridle wear - so, I know what that means. . . he loves me, Joanne.'

"Looks like Amazon is going to start delivering babies."

"Wow, I did not see that coming."

Affordable homes coming soon - 'If they build these then our house will become affordable...!'

'My life began at 40 but my credit problems had a huge head start.'

"The Sculleys, the Jensons, the Walkers, Freedy, Joan, Don and the Bowes. Oh, well, Madame de Stael had to start somewhere."

'Do you think I'm conceited?' 'No,why?' 'Girls that are pretty and intelligent sometimes are conceited.'

"If I use twitter to communicate, does that make me a twit?"

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

'I'm not concerned that coffee might keep me awake all night. I have credit problems that do that for me.'

I went to the book store, drank coffee, listened to some guitar player, talked to a friend, and forgot to buy my book!

'But, by not getting married, we've eliminated any chance of divorce.'

'I'm an Earth sign and Clive is a Water sign. Together we make mud.'