Ghost Story Admirer Pillows

'Hold on... If you're not dead who's skull is this?'

'Oh, get a life ...'

'It's a special bargain, sir...Oh. Never mind.'

Zombie Pirate

Sir Oliver Murgatroyd

Sir Roderick Murgatroyd

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

Zombies.

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"Fred's had too much to drink - now he's hitting on that old coat rack."

"800 years old?!! - Gosh... you must be feeling very 'long-in-the tooth."

The Reaper's Arms

Man runs scared from ringing graveyard bell.

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

"Get a tomb!"

'Maybe fruit flies don't have souls.'

"You will be visited by three ghosts - the Ghost of Porfolios Past, The Ghost of Present Positions and the Ghost of Commodities Future."

"I had a Caesar salad for lunch, but that was two days ago."

'Oi mate! No hoods in the shopping mall.'

Redlaw and the Phantom

Ghostship

'Your deceased husband keeps saying: don't call him. He'll call you.'

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

Sir Desmond Murgatroyd

Sir Conrad Murgatroyd

"Take my word for it, sir―it looks just great on you!"

"The Ruin is under new management. Specters will manage wraiths, shades and spirits. All others report to be spook resources. Bonuses will be based on team work and synergy."

'Egad! It's the ghosts of sanity past!'