German Culture Dabblers Pillows

'Umlauts...happens every time.'

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

"We feel you're over analyzing things a bit too much."

My first mistake.

'When the school upgraded its operating system, for the third time, I upgraded my headache medicine from over-the-counter to prescription strength.'

"I just finished a 10-day cleanse. Now it's time to retox."

"Constant delays and confusion over Brexit are causing the firm huge problems. . ."

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

Brothers Grimm

The Screeeen!

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

'I don't surf the net, I just kind of dog-paddle through it.'

"Do you have a one day a year membership?"

Helmut Schmidt

Lohengrin

Gutrine

'He's at the 'awkward stage' in converting to paperless so he carries both a laptop and a briefcase.'

Prussian Siege of Paris, 1870

'I think we've created a yob culture!'

"The Real Dot Com."

I was having fun making log letters when someone asked "why?" So I Qui

"Dad, let's play hide and go seek. I'll hide your data, and you seek it. And when you can't find it, you pay me to return it."

Angela Merkel's Retirement

"I'm scanning these old photos we're afraid of losing into my computer so I can lose them there."

Germany Beer

"Oh no! Buy new clothes so I can go on a date, and then I have to ask dad for a ride to the movies, and I got this pimple last week right on my chin! Why is this happening?!"

'She's system two and this is the new beta release.'

"My husband said I should try a cookbook when I'm cooking! But I don't think it will taste any better!"

Angela Merkel

"Never mind your astrological sign, what's your net worth?"