German Culture Dabblers Pillows

'Umlauts...happens every time.'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"We feel you're over analyzing things a bit too much."

My first mistake.

'When the school upgraded its operating system, for the third time, I upgraded my headache medicine from over-the-counter to prescription strength.'

"Constant delays and confusion over Brexit are causing the firm huge problems. . ."

"I just finished a 10-day cleanse. Now it's time to retox."

'Sometimes it's not a very good idea to be indecisive.'

Brothers Grimm

'I can't get the hang of this cloud computing...'

The Screeeen!

'When did 'At Ease' become 'Chill'?'

'I don't surf the net, I just kind of dog-paddle through it.'

"Do you have a one day a year membership?"

'What was the question?'

Gutrine

Lohengrin

Helmut Schmidt

'He's at the 'awkward stage' in converting to paperless so he carries both a laptop and a briefcase.'

Prussian Siege of Paris, 1870

I was having fun making log letters when someone asked "why?" So I Qui

'I think we've created a yob culture!'

"The Real Dot Com."

"I'm scanning these old photos we're afraid of losing into my computer so I can lose them there."

Angela Merkel's Retirement

"Dad, let's play hide and go seek. I'll hide your data, and you seek it. And when you can't find it, you pay me to return it."

Germany Beer

"My husband said I should try a cookbook when I'm cooking! But I don't think it will taste any better!"

"Oh no! Buy new clothes so I can go on a date, and then I have to ask dad for a ride to the movies, and I got this pimple last week right on my chin! Why is this happening?!"

'She's system two and this is the new beta release.'

Angela Merkel