Genome Navigator Gifts

On the road with the map of the human genome.

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Are we there yet?'

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

"I am not asking for directions."

"Whatever it is, we're up to our necks in it!"

Better times ahead.

Titanic: How's my steering.

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

Battery Lighthouse

Well, I finished my summer reading list – now what?

"Ya, right. Who needs a web presence. I'll just compete in the global economy from here."

"It's publish or perish, and he hasn't published."

'We're an international company, Mr. Zickenbarth. We've got creditors in more than 200 different countries!'

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"Who should we have at eye level this month?"

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

The Escape Key

"This translation app isn't working."

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

Meet the Shameless Self-Promoter 2 PM