Genetic Research Nerd Gifts

'The lab has come up with a neat solution to our staffing problem. These are junior executives in the larval stage.'

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

Gifts for a cloned baby!

Ascent of Machine.

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

Neil Armstrong Outtakes

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

"I've been genetically modified!"

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Naked Mole Rat

Vaccine

Gene Therapy

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"Nasty sunburn."

Genetic Fingerprinting.

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

Worries of the first single cell organism. Should I divide? Maybe I won't like my other self! Maybe it won't like me! Two might be nice company. Three, though, that could be crowded.

Charles Darwin

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

The end is near

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

Asteroid Denying Dinosaur vs. Asteroid Believing Dinosaur.

Professor Swizzlestix explains his point....

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

Clone Factory

'But we just don't have the technology to carry it out.'