Dna Nerd Gifts

'So...1% of our DNA says you're in a suit, while I'm sitting around with no clothes on piking stuff with sticks.'

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

Ascent of Machine.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

The Age of Reptiles. . .

"I'm an evolution denier. There's no way those people come from us."

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

"Let's get married, Miss Harris, and have 2.8 children!"

Gloat

Pregnant Panda at Edinburgh Zoo: 'Congratulations, Wilkinshaw...'

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

Vaccine

The real reason why flamingos are pink

Naked Mole Rat

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

"I'm afraid you need knee surgery."

Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

"Yo, this should be a two."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

Genetic Fingerprinting.