Genetic Enthusiasts Gifts

We can identify the genetic root of many problems... however your husbands being a long strak of water isn't one of them!

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

"...I think we've found the missing link!"

Genetic Fingerprinting.

Evolution...the dandy lion.

Charles Darwin

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

"Actually, I find his murky past rather attractive."

'Oh dear. My son's an evolutionary throw forward.'

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

"Okay, I fixed the leaking roof, and I moved the couch over to the far wall, but I'm sorry, I don't unblock toilets!"

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

'Well, look who has stock in Genomes-R-Us.'

'We've created a teenager!'

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'The future of medicine' "It's genomics." "I'd say proteins." "Same as always: economics."

'Now that we've learned to talk, we can have FOCUS GROUPS!'

DNA Xmas.

An inbred poodle.

Darwin's Evolving Statue.

"Crap. I overslept."

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'