Genetic Enthusiast Gifts

The study found humans have only about twice the number of genes as a fruit fly. Of course, the data could be off a bit. It was done by researchers who had only about twice the number of genes as a fruit fly.

"Frankly I'm a bit confused. According to the genetic printout this gentleman is, in fact, a goat

'I'm a good shopper. I know how to find bargains. I think it's genetic. My mother always said that when she married my dad, she got a real bargain.'

"Your look of total bewilderment - does it run in the family?"

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

"She takes after her father."

"He was the lifeguard at the gene pool."

"Ooh, Dave. Your DNA results have come back! According to this, you're 10% German, 15% Irish, and 75% layabout."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

"...I think we've found the missing link!"

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'At present, my son and I are extremely interested in genetics and heredity.'

Evolution...the dandy lion.

Charles Darwin

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

'Well, look who has stock in Genomes-R-Us.'

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

'We've created a teenager!'

Preparing for Casual Friday at the Genome Lab

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'The future of medicine' "It's genomics." "I'd say proteins." "Same as always: economics."

DNA Xmas.

Brian works in stem cell research

An inbred poodle.

The dna double helix, with a human family taking the place of the dna rungs (or bases), illustrating genetic inheritance within the family

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."