Future Genetic Enthusiast Gifts

"We want one that's genetically gifted but not genetically spoiled."

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

Little Doctor meets Little Geneticists.

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

"I've been genetically modified!"

'Sharon's into genetic engineering!'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

'At present, my son and I are extremely interested in genetics and heredity.'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

Uncle Mort, have you been playing with your home genetic engineering kit again? Guilty. I was trying to clone my own DNA. For laughs, I mixed up my genes with compost. Mixed up? Technically, cross-bred. Trump is a meathead! Well, you're a vegetable.

'Well, look who has stock in Genomes-R-Us.'

Preparing for Casual Friday at the Genome Lab

'We've created a teenager!'

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'The future of medicine' "It's genomics." "I'd say proteins." "Same as always: economics."

'He's got your tattoos.'

DNA Xmas.

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."

The dna double helix, with a human family taking the place of the dna rungs (or bases), illustrating genetic inheritance within the family

'Despite all the work that has been put into it, it's clear that the genome code is not a get-rich-quick scheme.'

DNA Lab. I spliced bee DNA into a dam-building rodent

'Good help is hard to find, so I decided to clone myself.'

'You may share 85% of your genetic material with him, but I share 5% tops.'

Genetic Manipulation

Brian works in stem cell research

An inbred poodle.

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'