Generational Discourse Pillows

"I think it's a library - you know, that place for middle-aged men to look at p********y."

"Nice haircut."

Pre-Old Blues

'Well, isn't this nice? Three generations all sitting down together.'

'Grandpa, what was manufacturing?'

'Beware of the teenager.'

"We're looking forward to this little bundle of joy bringing out the worst in each of us."

"1971... 2015..."

Not-so-easy listening...

"It's a fortuitous coincidence that the greatest moments in music history were when I was in high school."

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.

"Gramps, you were alive before everyone knew what you were doing on social media... What was that called?" "Bliss!"

"One day, son, all this anxiety will be yours."

'He was an impressionist. Like that Alistair McGowan...'

"That's right, son. God knew everything before Google."

Lemonade/Prune-aid

"The floor is now open for discussion of what to name ou generation."

"I'm glad you boys let me come along with you...it's nice to see how you kids live life! I mean, with youth on your side, I'm sure you live every moment to the fullest!"

"I can't image growing up without computers or cell phones. Your generation had it rough, huh, Dad?"

"Too bad we only see each other when we're hungry! I know! Let's go on a date, a real date!"

"My dad and I are trading important life skills. He's teaching me how to change the oil in the car."

"My Dad keeps playing the awful originals to my remixes."

Yeah, I'm taking care of my parents now, too.

"How did people waste time before computers?"

An old man and young man who are mirror images of each other pass on a street

Contest time. Mort and Sadie, our ornery octogenarians, have decided to rename Rudy's generation. Mort favors Generation I - for impatient. Sadie prefers Generation V - for virtual. Or vapid! What do you think? Please send your own ideas to asksadieshow@gmail.com. C'mon people, get thinkin'!

'That's the trouble with the older generation...they're too intolerant.'

"I'm going to e-mail you this op-ed about how your generation is ruining everything."

"Grandpa, how old were you when you learned how to velcro your sneakers?"

"I invited my friends over so we can see how much your generation is leaving us to pay off!"

Bah, when I was your age, I had to walk five miles through the snow just to ... to ... Well, just to walk five miles through the snow, I guess.

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, My mother doesn't want me to get a tattoo, but I disagree. I believe that a tattoo would be very attractive. What do you think? - Jessica, rebellious daughter. *(Actual reader letter). Is this serious? Is this a real letter? They're all real. I am stunned. Stunned? What is wrong with children? Defying their mothers? Do you know what would happen if we had defied our parents like that? What? They'd have sent us to live in the old country with our illiterate cousins who left

'Just a minute, Mom...Grandpa needs help getting the child-proof caps off his medication bottles.'

"So, when you young execs talk about 'phoning it in' there's no actual phone involved?"

Old Ringed Planet: '( Humph! ) Teenagers.'