Gene Pool Enthusiast Gifts

Genetic researcher to kid: 'No, I'm not exactly the lifeguard of the gene pool.'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

"I've been genetically modified!"

Gene Therapy

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

You've determined the DNA genome for felines? What do you call it? "Helix the Cat".

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

'The future of medicine' "It's genomics." "I'd say proteins." "Same as always: economics."

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'He's got your tattoos.'

DNA Xmas.

Mother: 'He has your eyes.'

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

'Good help is hard to find, so I decided to clone myself.'

Genetic Manipulation

Baldness Facts

'You may share 85% of your genetic material with him, but I share 5% tops.'

DNA Lab. I spliced bee DNA into a dam-building rodent

Brian works in stem cell research

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

An inbred poodle.

'I'm afraid our worst suspicions have been confirmed - we found slug, snail and a trace amount of puppydog tail.'

'Happy New Ear!'

Dolly, Twenty Years Later

Elementary Genetics

"It's amazing how much he's like one of his dads."