Gene Pool Enthusiast Pillows

Genetic researcher to kid: 'No, I'm not exactly the lifeguard of the gene pool.'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Gene Therapy

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'The future of medicine' "It's genomics." "I'd say proteins." "Same as always: economics."

DNA Xmas.

'Good help is hard to find, so I decided to clone myself.'

An inbred poodle.

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

'You may share 85% of your genetic material with him, but I share 5% tops.'

Genetic Manipulation

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."

Mother: 'He has your eyes.'

Baldness Facts

Brian works in stem cell research

'I'm afraid our worst suspicions have been confirmed - we found slug, snail and a trace amount of puppydog tail.'

'Happy New Ear!'

Dolly, Twenty Years Later

Elementary Genetics

'Sometimes I wonder how things would have turned out, if I'd gotten Mom's eyes and Dad's hair.'

"It's amazing how much he's like one of his dads."