Gene Manipulation Ponderer Gifts

Clone Factory

"You want a generic or a regular sugar pill?"

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"I hate it when the palcebo does better than the drugs we're testing."

"What if it's smarter than us?"

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!!"

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

Robot Attack in Bath

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

"Well I think the Real question is..."

"I can't help thinking there's a book in this."

'Actually, I'm a placebo psychiatrist.'

'Revolution? I thought you creatures said you wanted Evolution!'

"An equation for your thoughts?"

"I want my job back."

"I'm prescribing a placebo. You'll have to explain to him that it's really working."

"This is going to ruin my ratio of protein to vegetables."

'Well, so much for that round-earth theory of yours, smart guy.'

Well at least we can handle these rocks.

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"Well Doctor, I thought if a placebo works, this might as well..."

"They're some kind of robot, perhaps artificially intelligent."

"Shouldn't we hold off an artificial intelligence until we figure out actual intelligence?"

"You know, lentils have twice as much protein per serving."

"We still don't understand how this happened. You were with the placebo control group."

Mountains and Molehills

'What did we do before China made everything?'

"These industrial robots don't complain, but they don't show fear, either. I miss the fear."

"...and the women who used the placebo makeup turned out to be just as attractive."