Science Ponderer Gifts

"Of course I'm glad we escaped, I just wish I could say goodbye to the cocaine button one more time."

'Well, so much for that round-earth theory of yours, smart guy.'

'Really, Grandpa, I don't need to know about bubbles' surface tension, pressure and elasticity to enjoy blowing them.'

'Revolution? I thought you creatures said you wanted Evolution!'

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

"An equation for your thoughts?"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'But what is the universe for?'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

'You forgot to pay the gravity bill, didn't you?'

God Sneezes Out Creation

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"Needs to get a life"

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

The Origins of Everything

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.