Geeky Giggler Gifts

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

Computer basics for non-geeks: Mouse Pad.

Nethead strip: Speak binary

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Cavemen Exhibit

'I can't hire you, but I can sell you some stock in the company.'

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

"This computer program is very intuitive. It automatically calls me when you do something stupid."

'I'm sorry for laughing Emperor Dorkbutt, it's just that in our language, well...'

"Let's see if I understand: your brain can't be upgraded with additional memory, and to make matters even worse, untold thousands of those brain cells die each day?"

We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

'I see you decided to build your own motorcycle. By the way, did you, by any chance, fail shop class in school?'

Black Hole Corks

'Millions of billions of trillions of light years away? I could visualise it if you said it in MILES!'

'But seriously , folks, I know you're out there, I can hear you bleeding!'

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

"Two things are infinite: The universe and human stupididy' and I'm not sure about the universe." Albert Einstein. Our colleague and I were going to debate, with me arguing the universe is finite and he's arguing that it's infinite. But he pulled out saying the debate organizers are biased against his position. He didn't believe they were simply advising folks to arrive early when they said "space is limited."

"It's a smart toaster. If you can't figure it out, press the 'Dumb It Down' button."

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

Astronaut with his Space Dog.

The Big A** Theory

The sudden extinction of prehistoric clowns explained.

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

"After analyzing the energy waves emitted by this pulsar near Andromeda, I believe we have an answer to the age old question: 'Where do jokes come from?'"

Search for Extraterrestrial Life. Ernie is working on a theory that alien life forms avoid the Milky Way galaxy because they're lactose intolerant.

Virtual chicken crossing the road.

Cyber Cafe - "I hear you've got a mouse."

"It's bad news I'm afraid...we've lost his web site!"