Gastronaut T-Shirts

Fuels paradise.

Counting ribs

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

Holiday Supplies

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

"I think foie gras is French for endless buffet."

"It's a Haiku Dinner."

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"I don’t know, Margaret. She looks like the type who makes exotic stuffings."

"It's been redacted to produce our sauces."

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

Platter confusion.

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

'May I suggest a pleasant viognier to put the subtext into gear?'

"Who ordered the moose en croute?"

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

Decaying corpse

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

'Order fast, folks - the prices have an expiration date.'

"It's a combination of pizza and sushi and taco and egg roll and...it's just something everyone loves."

"Our sommelier - years of experience in French urinals."

Picasso

"Would you like the Death by Chocolate, Cheesecake, Brownie, Fudge, or just peacefully while you sleep?"

'How do you guys want your trans fatty acids prepared?'

'Who orderes the roasted chicken plate and who ordered the soup?'

'listen - it's haute cuisine, coming up the river from New Orleans.'

Fast Nouvelle Cuisine.

The art of pizza