Garage Philosopher Gifts

'It gets me from A to B alright but it won't get me from B back to A!!'

Useful and Useless Screws

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'Believing any filming experience may help launch acting careers, some even stage their appearances before closed circuit cameras.'

'My electric car is giving me static!'

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

Organic Soldering.

Inflating Boobs.

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

"I'd like my daughter to know something about engines."

"Because you're a mechanic, we're going to do your hydrotherapy in a car pool."

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

Bob’s Museum

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

The Boys of Indian Summer

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

Animals are smarter than we think!

"Installed it himself ??" saved $50."

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

When did you last have your oil changed?

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

'Sorry, pastor, your soul's grace period is eternity, your car's is six minutes.'

'A belt will have to be tightened...not the cars...yours.'

His and Hers Garage

'We couldn't find anything wrong with your car, so all you owe us is for 2 hours of search.'

Acme Flyswatters.

'I need a really loud horn. My brakes are a bit spongy.'

"I swear, we spend more time decided which squirrel to bark at than we do actually barking at it."

'Well, if I have a short circuit, just lengthen it.'