Gaming Guru Gifts

A puzzle cube seeks enlightenment

'School sports day - fat boys playing computer game'

"I've been looking for a job, but I haven't seen any yet."

"I don't care which parent I get as long as it's the same one that gets the Playstation."

"You're right. I should go outside and play. Buy me a laptop, and I will."

As he picked up the video game controller, the trap was sprung, and Ryan's mother forced him to fill out college applications.

'In case you were wondering why the doctor plays computer games all day. . . He is actually controlling me.'

'Dang! Crashed again! Oh well... I've got to get to my flight.'

Game Addiction

'Our son, who's forbidden to play with guns, has just wiped out civilization with his simulation game!'

'I hear he's a software pirate.'

"She won't even notice when it's safe to go out again."

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

'It's an optical illusion. From the front of the room, they're all busy students working on computer projects. From here though they're all busy playing internet games.'

You read the instruction manual for a video game for your book report?

"Why don't you get off the computer and watch some TV?"

Modern Day Hide And Seek.

"It's a really cool game! You're Bill Gates, and you have to fight off the evil agents of the Justice Department before they destroy your planet."

'Mom, did I come preassembled or did you and dad have to put me together?'

'I wasn't talking on my cellphone. . . I was playing a videogame.'

Monolithopoly.

'You've been on that Video Game all Day. Go outside and play.'

Virtual Office

Virtual Babe

'Sorry, but I'm looking for a toaster that I can also play games on.'

"Well, I told you those video games were getting too realistic, Frank, but you just wouldn't listen!"

'I mean, how totally lame is this? Just as the marketing for our new video game was about to go viral, the Center for Disease Control shut us down!'

Write a Screenplay

"That was before I found this amazing new way to earn $$$ working from home."

"Go out and play? What is this, 1962?"

Benjamin invited me to a bring your own video game party.

"I miss being a passive spectator."

'I am playing outside, Mom -- look at the graphics.'

"Kids, look at the weather! Why don't you play outside?"

"'GameBoy: A Memoir of Addiction', by Ronald Markowitz."