Gag Gift Admirer Pillows

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Bubble Gum Farms.

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Colin's dying to show you how his renewable energy scheme works.'

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

Hey, I think I found something. Heavy metal detector.

Clown's Cuckoo Clock.

"He won't eat anything but corn."

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

Lavatory Waterfall

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'There's a little bit of my late husband in every glass - I used his ashes as a fining agent.'

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

The magic of April Fools' morning.

"Sure I can't pop that in a bag for you, sir?"

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

"Duct tape fixes leaks in the office, too."

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

Undertaker with 'light', 'done', and 'RIP' settings on his toaster.

'...and don't think I didn't see that flying tackle.'

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

Paul McCartney, The Surgeon - "I want to hold your gland yeah, yeah, yeah..."

Egypt 1896. Dr Howard Prendergast and Percy Smythe discover the tomb of King Ahktuman the Practical Joker, proving conclusively that the ancient Egyptians were the first culture to use whoopee cushion.

Emergency Underpants

'Well, you make it sound silly. All my new hybriproducts are unique and useful.'

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

'Congratulations - you're the first victim of recombinant DNA.'