Gag Gift Enthusiasts Pillows

I need something to hold my tummy in

Cow-print panties. Co-workers discuss a failed gift.

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

'Colin's dying to show you how his renewable energy scheme works.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Little girl hoses down walkway as Santa slips and falls

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

"He won't eat anything but corn."

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

Lavatory Waterfall

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'

'Don't you love the clean, fresh smell of the morning air?'

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

Egypt 1896. Dr Howard Prendergast and Percy Smythe discover the tomb of King Ahktuman the Practical Joker, proving conclusively that the ancient Egyptians were the first culture to use whoopee cushion.

'...and don't think I didn't see that flying tackle.'

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

"Duct tape fixes leaks in the office, too."

'Well, you make it sound silly. All my new hybriproducts are unique and useful.'

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

Undertaker with 'light', 'done', and 'RIP' settings on his toaster.

Joke Shop product - Not Funny After 10 Sept 87

'Congratulations - you're the first victim of recombinant DNA.'

"You must see someone about your problem."

"My body is a temple... unfortunately it's in ruins"

Wise man scaring baby Jesus.