Future Academic Enthusiast Gifts

"OK, I've whittled down my list. When I go to college, I'm gonna study either law, biology and engineering...or journalism, medicine, anatomy, political science, forestry, business, math..."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

Burning the midnight oil.

Scarcity

"Doing your homework may lead to a job that has homework."

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

Congratulations! All that cramming paid off.

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

Six Thinking Hats

A Preschool of Fish

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

'We're out of earshot now, so you can drop the phoney, Oxbridge accent.'

"So the secret to getting good grades is to study hard...seems a little extreme!"

'I need to read five books this weekend to graduate - any suggestions?'

Kindergarten. Today; Simon Says. I don't know who this "Simon Says" is, but he could make a killing in product endorsements!

"We come from the future and just want to say: Hey, thanks for the planet!"

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

"And just how do you expect to become a made man, son, without a solid liberal-arts education?"

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

'At first it's just kindergarten, but then mission creep takes over and you're in college.'

"Fifty years in academia, studying, researching, writing and teaching. And what do they call me? ‘The Human AI’."

'Life isn't fair and neither is Miss Brown!'

"My father was a Brexit negotiator and his father before him..."

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

Max Weber

Abacus.